You can do better. It started one night when we realized that we were both pining over the respective guys that we were seeing (or maybe more accurately, trying to see) and evaluating our own behavior towards them, asking what we could have, should have, would have done differently.
Then we realized that we could have, should have, would have done nothing. If the way these men were treating us was making us unhappy, then why should we be questioning ourselves? And "You can do better" was born.
We realized that if someone's behavior is a source of unhappiness or discontent, then not only would we be unable to change the person to make us happier, but it wouldn't even be worth the effort! So we made a list of everything that made us unhappy, everything that we should not allow ourselves to settle for, and said that if someone we were seeing belonged on the list, then we could do better. Sometimes it's funny, sometimes it's heartbreaking, but it's always true. And once it was written down, it was like a big dose of reality and empowerment rolled into one.
The purpose of "You can do better" is not to set impossible standards or refuse to compromise. "You can do better" is about not compromising respect and fulfillment. It doesn't matter if he's into you or not, but if he can't pull it together for you, then you can do better!
If he never asks you how you are, then you can do better!
If he tells you that you aren't 'allowed' to get a tattoo, then details the one that he is planning to get, then you can do better!
If he doesn't notice your eyes glazing over, then you can do better!
If his interest in seeing you seems to have a direct positive correlation with your disinterest in seeing him, then you can do better!
If he has a veritable shag-rug of back hair (even if he shaves it just for you), then you can do better!
If he listens to self help books on tape to get to sleep, then you can do better.
If he suggests that you listen to his creepy self help books on tape to get to sleep (because he made you cry), then you can do better!
If he communicates important information concerning your relationship by cc'ing you on an email to someone else, then you can do better!
If he texts you asking if you're up for "a little slap and tickle," then you can do better!
If he posts a picture of his butt crack on Facebook, then you can do better!
(For the boys:)If she mistakes a picture of your brother for you and says that you look much better without your glasses, then you can do better!
If he says he doesn't think about you when the two of you aren't together, then you can do better!
If you find yourself constantly explaining why it doesn't matter that you find him unattractive, then you can do better!
If the best compliment he's given you recently is "god, I forgot what a porn star you are" while you are pleasuring him orally, then you can do better!
If he calls his penis his "d" in a text message and then goes on to describe what he wants you to do to it, then you can do better!
If he describes his ideal life partner and she's the exact opposite of you, then you can do better!
If he uses you to gain a bus driver's sympathy to duck out of a two dollar bus fare, then you can do better!
If your second date is in court, then you can do better!
If you spend an amazing week together and when you leave she refuses to stay in contact with you, then you can do better!
If she tells you she started seeing someone the DAY after you've returned from visiting her half-way around the world, then you can do better!
If you spend time and money to cross thousands of miles to visit him and he doesn't think it's worth it to do the same for you, then you can do better!
If he promises to visit you, later tells you he doesn't have the time, and instead spends two months road tripping across the states with another girl, then you can do better!
If he calls you "cuddlecake," then you can do better!
If, immediately after taking your number, he asks if you've ever been a mistress before and if, when you decline, he sends a text attempting to explain himself as follows: "I just wanted to be honest with you," then you can do better!
If he wants you to wear pigtails and ruffled socks, then you can do better!
If he enjoys offending you, then you can do better.
If he has a Boston accent, but isn't even from Boston, then you can do better!
If he turns sweet nothings into a competition, then you can do better.
If he says he just doesn't think about you when you aren't together, then you can do better!
If he had sex with your friend, then decides that he wants you, and texts her after you turn him down, then you can do better!
If he says, "we're both broken," then you can do better!
If he licks you and says, "you taste salty, like a saltine cracker," then you can do better!
If he buys a ticket to fly out of state to see another girl the day after you fly out of state to see him, then you can do better!
If he makes you pay for your own drinks, then you can do better!
If she gets banned from a jail, then you can do better!
If he gives you back "the sweater you left at his apartment," but it clearly belongs to another girl, then you can do better!
If he gets banned for life from the dive bar at which he has been a regular for months, then you can do better!
If he think he's complimenting you when he tells you you're the least man-hating feminist he's ever met, then you can do better!
If he assumes you will enjoy cherry flavored cloves "because you're a girl," then you can do better!
If he's a fan of taxidermy (unless you also are), then you can do better!
If he flirts with you by showing you the pictures in his iphone, then you can do better!
If he follows you around to "protect" you (inspired by Twilight), then you can do better!
If he sneaks into your room to watch you sleep (inspired by Twilight), then you can do better!
If he asks you to fix his car so he can date another girl (inspired by Archie Comics), then you can do better!
If he says he "doesn't believe anything crazy... like evolution," then you can do better!
If he would prefer to email back and forth with you than see you in person, then you can do better!
If on your first date, he's fallen asleep by the time you get back from the bathroom, then you can do better!