You can do better. It started one night when we realized that we were both pining over the respective guys that we were seeing (or maybe more accurately, trying to see) and evaluating our own behavior towards them, asking what we could have, should have, would have done differently.
Then we realized that we could have, should have, would have done nothing. If the way these men were treating us was making us unhappy, then why should we be questioning ourselves? And "You can do better" was born.
We realized that if someone's behavior is a source of unhappiness or discontent, then not only would we be unable to change the person to make us happier, but it wouldn't even be worth the effort! So we made a list of everything that made us unhappy, everything that we should not allow ourselves to settle for, and said that if someone we were seeing belonged on the list, then we could do better. Sometimes it's funny, sometimes it's heartbreaking, but it's always true. And once it was written down, it was like a big dose of reality and empowerment rolled into one.
The purpose of "You can do better" is not to set impossible standards or refuse to compromise. "You can do better" is about not compromising respect and fulfillment. It doesn't matter if he's into you or not, but if he can't pull it together for you, then you can do better!
If you have to request his friendship multiple times on Facebook or Myspace before he approves your request, then you can do better!
If when you apologize about calling him a douchebag in an email/text/facebook message, he ignores you, then you can do (and act) better!
If he aggravates you so much that you find yourself doing crazy drunken girl things, like loudly screaming that he is a douchebag in public, then you can do (and act) better!
If his flirting technique has yet to progress past the first grade level (e.g. pushing you and then running away), then you can do better!
If he's slept with one friend and throw a drink another's face, then you can do better!
If he has been formally introduced to you (multiple times), acts interested, but never approaches you, then you can do better!
If he tells you to get beer, but doesn't pay you back for it, then you can do better!
If he begs you to let him come into your apartment to have sex and later says he's trying to stop sleeping around, then you can do better!
If he doesn't have condoms and can't wait to to have sex before buying them, then you can do better!
If he kisses another girl before trying to go home with you, then you can do better!
If he initiates unprotected sex, but afterward gets mad at you for not telling him your sexual history and calls you a slut, then you can do better!
If he claims he hasn't done drugs in years (because he had problems with addiction no less), then tells you he just bought a bag of pot last night, then you can do better!
If he lies on top of you, calls you his little pony and tries to brush your hair, then you can do better!
If the same trash and empty food containers are strewn around his apartment a week after you first saw them there, then you can do better!
If you can't seem to figure out who his girlfriend actually is, or if he even has one, based on the girls to whom you see him talking, then you can do better!
If you are both past legal drinking age, and he thinks being three years older than you entitles him to constantly patronize you, then you can do better!
If he complains once you've dumped him about having to pack up all his stuff alone even though it's in your apartment, you're away and he has been staying with you because he's too cheap to get a sublet before his new flat opens up, then you can do better!
If you suspect one of his ex-girlfriends has already posted to this site since his favorite book is Catcher in the Rye too, then you can do better!
If he gets angry and self-righteous and resents you for asking him to change his behavior, then you can do better!
If he buys you a cactus for Valentine's day, then you can do better!
If he doesn't tell his best friend to f*** off after he makes a pass at you, and doesn't man up enough to tell him he doesn't want to go to strip clubs with him even though he tells you he thinks they're exploitative, then you can do better!
If he can't grow a pair, then you can do better!